Al + Lisa

Alan and Lisa Robertson, members of America’s favorite back woods family and the Duck Commander Clan, take on the topic of relationships as they share the secrets that saved their marriage.

Infidelity, deceit, distrust, and shame. Unfortunately, these are recurring themes in many of today’s marriages in America—even in the family-values-promoting, Christian-based Robertson family. With a romance that began in junior high, the couple got off to a rocky start but soon settled into married life and had two baby girls. Al became a pastor in the church where his family had been members for years. Then, when Lisa had an affair, the heartache and the tension was very public. Their candid story is one of rescued love and renewed commitment. After nearly getting divorced, Al and Lisa came to terms with what went wrong in their marriage and both began the hard work of making it right.

Now, married for over thirty years, they openly share their hardships—including sexual abuse, alcohol abuse, and abortion as they counsel couples in trouble and speak across the country at churches, marriage retreats, pregnancy centers, many other events.  Al and Lisa live in West Monroe, Louisiana with the rest of the Duck Commander family. They have 2 beautiful daughters, who are both married and have 6 grandchildren.

Al’s Story

Alan Robertson is the oldest son of Phil and Miss Kay Robertson. He helped start the family business, Duck Commander and left there in the late ‘80’s to serve as a Pastor for 22 years at the White’s Ferry Road Church in West Monroe, LA. He went back to Duck Commander in 2012 to begin appearing on the Robertson’s TV show, Duck Dynasty on A&E, which just ended after 11 Seasons and 131 episodes.  He has authored and co-authored five books and speaks around the country about the reasons behind the success of the show and Robertson values of faith, family & ducks. Alan & Miss Kay opened Miss Kay’s Sweets and Eats in West Monroe in 2016.

Alan and his wife, Lisa, have been married for over 32 years and have two married daughters and six grandchildren. They live on the same street as Alan’s “hairy” brothers and their families in West Monroe, LA. They have co-authored two books, A New Season about their life and marriage and The Duck Commander Devotional for Couples and they travel together all over America sharing their story of brokenness, restoration and healing in their marriage. They are currently speaking together around the country and writing their third book about desperate forgiveness.

Lisa’s Story

Lisa Robertson is the first Robertson daughter-in-law—married to Alan Robertson—the oldest son of Phil and Kay Robertson.  Lisa was instructed in the ways of the kitchen by Miss Kay and continues to help Miss Kay with her busy schedule.  Lisa co-authored, The Women of Duck Commander, with her sisters-in-law and Miss Kay, released in April, 2014.

Lisa speaks at Pregnancy centers and Pro-Life events all over the country. Lisa has a powerful life change story that impacts the lives of those she meets. She & Al know first hand the devastating effects sin has on lives.  She and Al have a book that released in 2015 titled A New Season that talks about their lives and marriage and the difficulties that couples can face. She and Al released Duck Commander Devotional for Couples in February of 2016. They are currently working on a new book with a working title of Desperate Forgiveness.

When Lisa is home in West Monroe, she loves spending time with her 6 grandchildren and helping to take care of them and going on as many trips with them as possible each year.

A personal story of struggle...

Al and Lisa dated on and off during their high school years, marrying on Nov. 9, 1984 — when they were both still teenagers. It was the summer of 1989 when Al and Lisa experienced what they now refer to as “dodging a bullet.” Lisa had become emotionally involved in an inappropriate relationship with a man she met through work. She clarifies that the relationship was never sexual, although it did become romantic.

In their book, Al acknowledges offering forgiveness to the man involved because he had apologized to Al with humility and courage. Al writes that because Lisa, too, felt terrible and was truly sorry, he forgave her. But he also admits that he made the mistake of threatening his wife by saying: “If you ever do anything like this again, I will divorce you!” He writes, “In the wake of the infidelity, everything we did for the next several months, we did wrong. We wanted to reconcile, but we really did not know how. … Every time we had any kind of argument, I managed to bring up Lisa’s extramarital relationship and used it against her.” Apparently reconciliation would require more than just staying together.

Although Al and Lisa both agree that during the next several years they managed to “function well,” they also admit to having taken care of their family and their ministry, but not their marriage. Less than a decade later, the Robertsons once again found themselves dealing with the issue of unfaithfulness.

Lisa had been contacted at work by an old boyfriend. Fourteen months later, she was caught up in a full-blown affair. It was the summer of 1999 when Al became suspicious that Lisa might be seeing someone, and despite her denial and deceit, he finally used cell phone records to piece together the truth. This time the consequences would be greater and the work they would do to rebuild their relationship would be intense.

During this season in their marriage, Al and Lisa opted for a temporary separation and committed to working with a professional counselor. Their efforts paid off when they celebrated a private vow-renewal ceremony in December of that same year. Al and Lisa clarify in their book: “At this writing, we have 30 years of marriage and almost 50 years of living under our belts. One of the hallmarks of our lives and our relationship is reconciliation. Simply put, reconciliation is the idea that things and people that are broken can be put back together.” And that’s why they encourage couples dealing with the shock of an affair to consider the possibility of recovery.

Recovery after an affair...

Although a wounded husband and wife ultimately have to be the ones to make the decision to stay together, Al and Lisa endeavor to inspire couples toward that decision by discussing the marital factors that often lead to affairs.

“You didn’t start out standing in front of a preacher making your vows and imagining you’d be sitting on this couch talking to us today,” Al explains to couples. “So let’s talk about how this came about. We’re looking at what’s wrong to get us to this place.”

Understanding that not every marriage can survive, Al and Lisa encourage husbands and wives to look ahead by considering what their post-divorce family might look like five years down the road. For couples with children, Al and Lisa talk about them because they believe kids don’t deserve to be in this place of brokenness. “They were born into this world deserving for you guys to get it right,” Al challenges the parents. He says that this kind of focus often resonates with couples in crisis.

Al and Lisa acknowledge that it’s hard to move past the hurt a couple feels in the moment of betrayal and discovery. But their experience has also taught them that choosing to stay together and work on reconciliation is best for everyone involved. “We now have older kids, and our daughter has told us many times that she wants a marriage like ours,” Lisa says. “She’s not talking about wanting to go through all the bad things that we went through, she’s talking about wanting the relationship that we have [today]. That would not have been possible had we not stuck it out and worked through our problems.”

Al and Lisa believe that couples must do the hard work after an affair — whatever that looks like. Regardless of the details of a couple’s story, the Robertsons are convinced that part of the hard work for every couple will ultimately be the choice to forgive. Too often Al and Lisa have seen unforgiveness leave a spouse dealing with bitterness, resentment and anger that has the potential to make him or her a bitter person. Lisa doesn’t hesitate to clarify that as believers we must consider forgiveness “because God tells us that we must forgive.” She points out that God has not given us a definitive timeline regarding forgiveness, but if God tells us to do something, then she’s convinced it must mean He’s given us the capacity to do it. Understanding that a wounded spouse may feel the cheating spouse doesn’t deserve forgiveness, Lisa comments, “When God tells us to forgive, He doesn’t tell us to forgive for the other person. He tells us to forgive for ourselves because it releases within us the victim mentality and the hurt.”

Where Did Y’all Meet? At the McDonald’s parking lot in West Monroe, which was a popular teen hangout back in the ’70’s-’80’s. He was 17 and a senior, she was 15 and a sophomore.

When Did You Get Married? In 1984, they lived with Al’s grandparents for the first six months where they were serenaded every night to dueling snoring by Granny and Pa.

Where Did You Live? A two room camp house next to Phil and Kay with only an outhouse out back for a bathroom.

What Did Y’all Do For Fun? Al and Lisa started a church volleyball league, were involved in bowling league and they also organized and oversaw an annual church golf tournament called “The Wormburner” that ran for 10 years and raised about $100,000 for different church projects and missions.

Say What?